Green Acres has its drawbacks

I love living on the ranch. BUT…

That being said, here is a list of 5 things that suck about living in the country.

1. Crappy internet service. You can get satellite, where they cap your data and isn’t all that fast, or you can get what amounts to a really big router providing you service, where you get more data but isn’t that fast. And at least it’s all unreliable. And expensive. And you can’t stream or play online games because — did I mention — It’s not that fast.

Hmm. A possible solution to rural pizza delivery.

Hmm. A possible solution to rural pizza delivery.

2. No pizza delivery. There are nights when you just want something delivered. Nada. Not going to happen.

3. A run to the store is a big time commitment. Sure there are some cool general stores and quick stop markets around that are only 10 or 15 minutes away. But if you want to go a hardware store or a real grocery? 30 minutes each way, minimum. Lesson? Don’t forget an ingredient.

4. Friends don’t visit. What used to be a drive down the street or across town is now a 45-60 minutes on 2-lane roads each way, and typically dark 2-lane roads at night. And since we tend to enjoy having a few brews with friends, that long time is an added deterrent as no one is interested in drinking and driving. Even when we offer the spare bedroom, it’s often too much for our city friends. And I can’t point fingers – when we lived in town, slogging out to visit our friends out here often ended with “ugh, it’s just too far.”

Maybe he's lonely because he doesn't show up. And don't get me started on Maytag...

Maybe he’s lonely because he doesn’t show up. And don’t get me started on Maytag…

5. Getting repair service is tough. First, a lot of repair outfits just don’t service folks in the country. Then, if they do, there is usually a sizeable service charge to cover the cost of the drive. More often than not, though, repair people simply don’t show up. This is a problem as we have to stay home from work to let people on the property (cows, gates, etc.) and we’ve been stood up more than once. “didn’t realize it was so far”, or “got lost”, or any number of other reasons. Or no reason at all, just radio silence. Thankfully The Tinker handles most repairs so these instances are pretty rare.

The theme here? These are all first-world problems. Friends don’t visit often, but the best ones do make it out, or we meet in town. Frozen pizza has come a long way. Stopping at the market on the way home from work and planning needs in advance minimizes the “emergency” rushes into town for ingredients or supplies. We limp along until repairs can be made if The Tinker can’t make them.

Nevertheless, the benefits of living here in the country – the privacy, the beauty, the peace, the animals, the land – far outweigh these petty inconveniences. But the internet is still slow.